Microaggressions

Microaggressions

When I attended the weekly prayer meeting for an organization to which I belong, the topic was the Special Olympics.  A member shared about his experiences with volunteering with the track team for this yearly event for people who are mentally challenged.  During the fellowship time after the meeting, the discussion turned to characteristics of the people who participate in the Special Olympics.  All of the comments were positive and accepting but full of stereotypes.  Topics discussed were whether "they" ever went to college, lived on their own or got married.  The speaker answered that some do and they even get married to others "like them".  I consider this unintentional microaggression because the people were consistently talked about as a group and not as individuals.  I would say this is an example of ableism. 

This made me uncomfortable because I have a very close friend who participated in the Special Olympics.  Yes, he lives on his own, has attended some college and is even engaged to a "normal" person.  I did not say anything during that discussion because I do not feel it is my place to tell my friend's story.  Later I asked him how he would have reacted in that situation.  Would he have shared that he had been in the Special Olympics?  He said he just doesn't know.

It is a good idea to put yourself in the shoes of someone who is different from the majority of the population.  To themselves they are normal.  Many don't go around thinking about their differences all day.  Their life is their life and their friends accept them the way they are.  Everyone appreciates being treated like human beings first and foremost.

I am not angered by my friends at the prayer meeting.  Part of our organization's mission is to love and serve others.  It just shows when you don't know people as individuals, it is easy to commit microaggression without even realizing it.

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

I surveyed my 3 co-teachers for their definitions of diversity and culture.  One is in her 20's and is engaged to and has a child with a man who was adopted from Brazil at age 3 and speaks some Portuguese.  Another is in her 30's and comes from a family that has owned a German food restaurant for 100 years.  The third is in her 50's and comes from an Irish heritage.

All of their definitions of culture included the words beliefs, customs and lifestyle. They also included traditional dress and language.  All of their definitions of diversity included differences or uniqueness in a wide variety of aspects and that these differences may all exist together in one setting.

My dad is 70 years old.  His definition of culture included "a way of life, a way of working, a way of maintaining family values and a way of solving conflicts.  The first word that popped into his mind when he heard diversity was "The Ohio State University".  That would be the most diverse place he could think of.  He went on to say different cultures, religions and points of view.  Reverse discrimination also came to mind since the first efforts at diversifying in his life time seemed that way.  The pendulum swung to where the dominant culture no longer got the promotions in the auto industry.

The different reactions of different age groups was most interesting to me.  In the world of early childhood culture and diversity are fairly common words.  My dad was at a loss at first to define diversity and his thoughts leaned more toward the negative side.  My goal for this world would be that people develop an interest in understanding others cultures in a deeper way.  I hope that diversity will be viewed as a beautiful thing in our future world, without anyone feeling left out.

My Family Culture

In the face of a complete upheaval of life as I know it, what three items would symbolize my family life and give me comfort?  I thought of a pearl ring which I always wear to remind me of my grandmother who always wore a pearl ring.  I think about a dish from the collection of glassware I inherited from my other grandmother.  I think about a Lutheran hymnal which symbolizes my family’s faith and love for music.  I think about a music box that plays Amazing Grace.  I think about a pad of paper and pen to merely write down all my memories. 

 

In the end I settle on three photographs to take with me.  The first would be of my parents on their wedding day.  The second would be of my family and my brother’s family with my mom and dad at my mom’s retirement party.  The third would be of me with my sweetheart.  These photographs would be a comfort to me because they are of people I love.  If I was separated from them, I would want to remember that they were real in my life and that I will see them again in heaven.  Photographs are very important in the life of my family.  Framed photos are everywhere you look in our homes.  They symbolize the love we have for each other and the joy we have in being together.

If I had to choose only one photo I would keep the one of my parents.  Their love for each other and commitment to each other in marriage is the root of my very being and my family life.  Their 50-plus years of marriage is a reminder of the strength they have given me to persevere and overcome adversity.  Looking into their young faces would always be a place to start remembering all of the good things in my life that started with that vow.

This was a good exercise for me.  I realized how much time I spend taking care of, acquiring and getting rid of “stuff”.  It is good to reflect on what t is really important.  If the people in my life are so important I must not let taking care of “stuff” get in the way of spending time with them.

I realize that behind this assignment is a truth.  This very situation has happened to refugees to America that live within miles of us.  It reminds me to have compassion for them, take every opportunity to learn what is really important to them and try to help them preserve as much of their culture as possible.